Sandman Where Art Thou?

I’ve suffered from bouts of insomnia before so I’m no stranger to long nights spent staring at the ceiling or wandering the rooms of my house.  But I can usually identify what the cause is of this inability to sleep.  Its hit me again…the absence of the sandman.  I haven’t been able to sleep well in weeks.  But I have been awake since..well..a while.  Sleep is really the only true escape we have from life’s trials and tribulations. When sleep evades me as it often does lately, I get annoyed.  I’m robbed from respite of worry.

So I wonder and I think and I worry and I am awake when all I want to be is asleep.

I never ever nap during the day because that will ensure that I don’t sleep at night.

I remember a time when my family was whole, when I wasn’t a widow and life wasn’t so bad when I would be awake while the rest of the world slumbered.  I didn’t mind my sleepless nights then.  I enjoyed the idea of being awake, watchful, mindful, while the rest of the world slept unaware.

Now?  Its nothing less than torture sometimes to be awake while everyone sleeps.

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